National Brain Fart Month, and Penile Obsessions

It’s amazing what you can gleam from 2 Google image searches and a minimum amount of Photoshopping.

I swear, I think this month my brain has been operating at far lower capacity than ever before.

This morning, I spent a half hour looking for my iPod, which I didn’t find. I know it’s in the apartment because I remember fiddling with it sometime around 8 or 9 last night to get it to stop playing when I was trying to focus on something else.

I get home, and it’s slipped into an almost impossibly hard to see couch crevice. Talk about a d’oh moment.

Anybody else having a month of absent minded behavior?

What else happened today?

Rappers are obsessed with dicks. Ghostface, for example, says

[Tony] Yayo can suck a fat d*ck. Tell him I said that,

in regards to Yayo claiming that Superb wrote most if not all of Supreme Clientele.

Nas, has a song on the Black History Month release that nobody can wait for that’s called “Fear,” but the full name of the song is, let me clear my throat:

‘The Fear of the Black Man’s Dick.’

Is Nas putting himself up in the running for best song title ever? I think so. I’ve also got money on Bill-O flipping his falafel over this.

In a piece of news that might lead me to never spend money on listening or listening to the rapper Cage ever again, it turns out that Shia LaBeouf is taking interest in a pet project film about the rapper’s life. LaBeouf is possibly the most succcessful member of this latest breed of talentless Disney grown doucheduffelbags like Zac Vans Defrens, and Miley Cyrus. Cage, this is your warning. Work with the LaBeouf and risk alienation of your fan base.

– So, surprise surprise, XBox Live is a cesspool of homophobic and bigoted assholes. I’m sorry for being so flippant about this, but Professor Mat Johnson, Halo afficionado, told me this a few years ago. Further, The Sun in the UK has been claiming that video game playing = illiteracy. I’d say that many stupid people are attracted to certain games that are nothing more than SHOOT ALIENS, but I know that smart people play Halo, and I know some smart people who play Guitar Hero (although one’s sole argument in defense of Guitar Hero’s stupidity is by trying to sing the instrumental to “Barracuda”), so what I’ll say is that I’m pretty sure the media is ignoring all the good things that probably happen on XBox live, like racists in different countries talking and developing cybersex based relationships.

– I almost went to this Billionaire Boy’s Club opening last night, thanks for the report Daily Intelligencer.

– Kidz In The Hall weren’t that impressive to me when they opened for the Clipse a while back. Maybe that was because they were signed to Rawkus. Now on Duck Down, they don’t suck, they actually entertain.

– In video gaming news, there will be a cross platform Ghostbusters game, which they’re making because Bill Murray, an idol of mine, is, amongst others in the cast, too lazy to film an actual movie. It will be written by the team of Ramis & Ackroyd, and I pray to god that the Wii version does not suck. By all rights, it should very well be the best, or at least the most fun, version of the game. Developer Red Fly claims that it will be great.

– Sony’s Playstation 3, sadly, might not have what we obsessed with the industry call Platform Exclusive titles. This would give buyers more reason to buy an XBox 360, and make the PS3 a poorly supported system, like the Gamecube nightmare. This all probably started out with the idea that Sony made a system that’s supposedly a pain in the urethra to develop for.

That’s all for today. Happy almost weekend, everybody.


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